Advanced Minds

you must keep fluffy bedding (pillows, comforters, etc.) well away from baby; and (3) you shouldn't be drunk or stoned while co-sleeping. So do the all the people that co-sleep do without pillows and comforters? I would think that a light fluffy cover would be better for sleeping *under* than a dense heavy thing like a couple of _layer_s of blankets. We have a big puffy quilted comforter.  It's very lightweight though, but I put Laura up high on the bed, so that if anything, the comforter only ever touches her feet.  She's between our pillows, but with plenty of room on either side of her so that she can't roll into the pillows or pull them over her face.  We snuggle down under the comforter, and it's still well away from Laura - has never been a problem.

I think that another rule for safe co-sleeping is that you shouldn't do it in a waterbed, because of the gap between the mattress and the box it sits in.  And I've heard that it's marginally safer to put the baby between mom and wall, because mothers instinctively won't roll on the baby (when sober etc.), but that fathers might.  Personally, DH is very aware of Sproutkin (perhaps because we've always slept with her) and we both wake up when the baby stirs, so I feel comfortable hemming her into the bed with pillows and leaving them sleeping while I shower in the morning.  That is, before this crawling thing started... My DH, though a deep sleeper, is also very aware of Laura, and it's never been a problem.  I often leave them in bed together, usually late at night when I want to finish stuff while they sleep.  I think he got used to being aware of something else besides me because the cat would sleep with us, and DH would pet the cat in his sleep without really waking up.  None of us tend to be rollers or tossers in our sleep though, so that probably helps.  DH usually doesn't stir when Laura does, unless I'm slow to get her latched on.

I felt although it was never specifically said, that  there was considerable suspicion (on my part if not on the authorities part) that the smothering wasn't entirely self-induced by the children.  I just don't see how a pillow or anything like that could be pressed firmly enough against a child's face that they couldn't breathe.  I guess no investigation was done because the care-giver was a good friend of the parents. What a horrifying thought.  That didn't even occur to me. Mary S.

We have a big puffy quilted comforter.  It's very lightweight though, but I put Laura up high on the bed, so that if anything, the comforter only ever touches her feet.  She's between our pillows, but with plenty of room on either side of her so that she can't roll into the pillows or pull them over her face.  We snuggle down under the comforter, and it's still well away from Laura - has never been a problem. Are you still co-sleeping?  I had thought you said that Laura always starts out in her crib, then moves when she wakes